"The Picture on the Box" Ephesians 4: 1-6

Joshua was not popular with the other kids. No, wait, that’s putting it gently. The other kids hated Josh, and after he ruined a great game they descended on him like a pack of wild, rabid, hyenas. “You are so stupid”. “Go home Loser”. They tore Joshua to shreds. This would have been a sad scene on any local playground. But it did not occur on the playground. This scene unfolded at a Church Youth Retreat. The adults jumped in to save Joshua, but the damage had been done. He crawled into a corner to cry, and the adults chastised the youth. “That was NOT Christian behavior”, they said. “What Would Jesus have done?” others asked. Properly chastised, the teens went on with their game, someone comforted Joshua, and the adults were left to wonder if any of their words sunk in. It’s kind of like what might have been going on over at good ol’ First Christian Church, Ephesus. While the folks there claimed to be Christians, we can assume from the tone of this letter, that their behavior just wasn’t quite up to par.
1. There are guidelines for Christian behavior. We have a picture of Christian living. We have instructions! You may say that the bible is filled with rules, so what makes this sermon any different? Well, the bible does give us rules, but these instructions are really guidelines for understanding everything else. They don’t negate the 10 commandments or Jesus’ commands. Instead, they form a framework for understanding all of the rules we are given. Imagine for a minute the night before a child’s birthday. You are spread out on the living room floor surrounded by the pieces to Barbie’s dream house. You have a few tools, a set of instructions in Japanese, and the picture on the box. Somehow with limited instructions and the picture you manage to build Barbie’s dreamhouse—much to the squealing delight of your 7 year old. So while the instructions were hard to understand, the picture on the box made clear what you were creating. In the letter to the Ephesians, the scripture sets forth a similar example. These four guidelines: humility, gentleness, patience, and love are the picture on the box! Sure we have a lot of instructions, but this letter gives us a clear picture of how to follow those rules. We have the instructions; we have the tools we need. We have a perfect picture of Chrisitan living. We have the picture on the box!
2. One of the tools we are given is Humility. So, Paul tells us to be humble. GREAT, you think, I’ve always wanted to be a doormat. Wait! Humility is NOT wimpy. Humility teaches us to be dependent on God. We can be strong and humble at the same time. We all know or know of someone who has been through a 12 step program. This is a great example of humility. The steps involve admitting you are powerless, believing that a power higher than yourself can restore you, turning your life over to God, and humbly asking God for help. This last step is the key, I think. Humbly asking God for help. Admitting that you need someone else’s help is an act of humility. Depending on someone else is an act of humility. More importantly, depending on God is an act of humility. If we humble ourselves before God, then God can lift us up. No, we are not doormats, but we can be humble in the sight of our God. Humility is a tool of necessity. We need to be strong and humble at the same time. We need to depend on God. We Need God!
3. Let’s pull out our measuring tape. In the Gentleness category, how do we measure up? Are we kind? Do we forgive? Or are we angry all of the time? Are we green with envy? Gentleness helps us keep our lives in control. Gentleness lets us show compassion to our friends and warmth to our enemies. Gentleness is controlled power. We can look through history and find examples of people who were powerful and yet gentle. Rosa Parks, Martin Luther King, Jr, Mahatma Ghandi, Mother Theresa. We see the powerful influence these people have, yet they were opposed to violence, wrath, and jealousy. Rosa Parks and Martin Luther King Junior fought for civil rights, yet they fought carefully. They helped people realize their own potential and showed others how to enact change. They were gentle people. Mahatma Ghandi advocated non-violence. He helped children learn and helped adults understand. Ghandi was a gentle man. Mother Theresa showed compassion toward everyone she met. She was strong enough to withstand sickness, and gentle enough to hold a dying child. Once, a reporter asked her why her nuns did the futile act of bathing dying beggars. She replied “So that those who live like dogs can die like angels” She was a gentle woman. These were gentle people. We can be gentle people too. We can buy lunch for a homeless person. We can visit sick children. We can help an older person retain their dignity. We CAN be gentle. If we are kind, compassionate, and tender we can measure up.
4. Patience is the glue. Patience helps us hold our stuff together. Patience is a tool for dealing with others. Imagine for a minute being stuck in traffic on the Watterson Expressway. You can see your exit in the distance. You are tempted to pull into the emergency lane and speed to your exit. What stops you? Patience. Your child pours her milk all over the kitchen floor, and then walks through it! What keeps you from losing your mind? Patience. A friend calls and rants and raves for 40 minutes on the evils of silly putty. What keeps you from hanging up? Patience. You see, God gives us patience so we can deal with other people. No, patience is not always easy. It is a decision that we act our way into. But we can learn to be patience. Patience helps us “keep it together”. It helps us keep ourselves sane. Patience is the glue that holds our sanity together.
5. We can do all things in love. Love is the picture on the box. It gives us a way to look at everything we do. Love is the ultimate guideline. Love is patient, gentle and humble. But love also cares, whether we like it or not. Mary was dying. The cancer was winning. As she lay in her hospital bed, her eyes often gazed at the portrait of Jesus on the wall. As people filtered in and out of the house, Mary would ask, “Have you met my friend?” and point to the picture. The response was usually, “I’m not here for that, I’m here to help you.” Mary would inevitably say, “I’m dying here, so shut up and let me show you how much I care”. She proceeded to use her cancer as a way of witnessing to others. She knew when to say, “Shut up and let me show you how much I care.” Love is knowing when to be assertive: gently, patiently and humbly assertive. God used Mary’s death to show a few precious people how much they are loved. God used Christ’s death to show ALL of us just how much we are loved. Christ died on the cross for our salvation, putting our well being above his own. Christ was the ultimate example of “Shut up and let me show you how I care”. Christ is the ultimate example of love. Yes, love is gentle, humble and patient, but love also gives us a reason for everything we do, including being assertive in showing how we care. Love is saying “Shut up and let me show you how much I care”. Lovc IS the picture on the box!

So, God has given us the instructions—the bible is full of ‘em. God has given us the tools we need: Humility, Gentleness, and patience. God has even given us the picture on the box. Let’s build our own dream house!

Those People Jonah 3-4

Dear God,
I just don’t get it. I know that what David did to me was wrong. But, I am a Christian, and I forgave him. Really I did. In my heart and in public I forgave him.
I really did forgive him God, but why did you have to? I know that you are forgiving, and I knew that you would forgive David. But, why do I feel betrayed by you when he takes communion in church? Why then do I get angry when he shows up at FCA? Why can’t I get past thinking of him as a hypocrite?
I really did forgive him God, but why does that terrible night haunt my heart, destroy my dreams, and scare my soul? Why God, does forgiveness not fix all of that. Is it because I’m angry? No, I’m not angry God, I’m damaged; I’m hurt; I’ve been forever changed.
I really did forgive him God, but why do I feel so sad? Shouldn’t you come into my heart and heal the hurt? Isn’t that your job as God? Did you heal his heart? Was his heart even hurt? Why doesn’t forgiveness fix all of this?
I really did forgive him God, but why can’t I forget? I can’t forget the pain and the embarrassment. I can’t forget the fear. I can’t forget. Why does the event of that one night affect everything I do so many days, weeks, months and years later?
I really did forgive him God, but will you now forgive me? Please?
--Jennifer
This thing called Grace is a funny thing. It happens when we least expect it, and it happens to people who we don’t think deserve it. Think of all the times you’ve said, “Oh I forgive You”, all the while secretly hoping that God will “get ‘em” the next moment. We watch someone speed by us on the interstate and secretly hope that they get pulled over. We look at bad things that happen, and say “God could never forgive THOSE people”. In Jennifer’s letter to God, David was one of “THOSE” people. The young woman sincerely thought she had forgiven, but she didn’t think that God should have. Somehow we have come to the conclusion that only a select group of people is worthy of God’s grace. We’re wrong. You see, this thing called Grace is truly a funny thing.
We have no say over who is worthy and who isn’t. Jonah was sure the Ninevites weren’t worthy of salvation. He was so sure of the fact that that he didn’t even want to deliver God’s message to them. Jonah didn’t want the Ninevites to have the smallest chance of salvation. Even after the Grace God had shown Jonah, Jonah could not believe in the possibility of grace for “THOSE people”. But, the joke was on Jonah. In the letter, Jennifer was quite sure that God would not forgive David. After God saved her from potential tragedy, she couldn’t bring herself to allow God to forgive “THAT” person who did “THAT” thing. She didn’t understand that wasn’t her decision to make. Jonah had no say over who was worthy, Jennifer had no say over who was worthy, and quite frankly, WE have no say over who is worthy.
God’s grace is universal, indiscriminate, and perfect. It transcends all of the earthly limitations we try to put on it. Grace is bigger and better than we are. This is a hard pill to swallow, but we must. God does forgive “THOSE” people. The truth is: We ARE “THOSE” people. We ARE the Ninevites and Davids of this world. You can look at it one of two ways: Everyone is worthy of Grace, or No one is worthy of Grace. Either way you look at it, you cannot escape that God forgives. And God DOES forgive. Regardless of whether we want forgiveness to happen, it happens. And to ask God to do otherwise, would be asking God to stop being God. Jonah did not want God to be God, and neither did Jennifer. They both wanted what they thought was ultimate justice. But, they didn’t understand that the perfection of God’s grace mirrors the perfection of God’s justice. Everyone receives equal treatment before God. EVERYONE. That is the perfection of God’s grace.
Despite this perfection, we have a little trouble dealing with it when God forgives someone seemingly undeserving—when God does forgive “THOSE” people. Face it; we don’t like to forgive. For humanity, Grace is complicated and messy. Practicing it might mean opposing the death penalty, or forgiving terrorism. Certainly if we can’t forgive, we don’t want God to either. In this way we are like Jonah. He was quite sure that the Ninevites did not deserve to be saved. He got so angry with God for forgiving “THOSE” people that he went out in the desert to pout. Jonah just did not understand that his understanding of forgiveness didn’t quite fit with God’s perfect Grace. Jennifer too was like Jonah. She was able to forgive (or so she thought), but she did not want God to do so. Her anger and frustration were expressed in her letter to God. Maybe we don’t express our confusion or anger like Jonah or Jennifer, but really we are the same way. -Perhaps we should instead stop being Jonah-ish, come out of our pouting place, and face the fact that God’s grace is inescapable and indiscriminate. No one can hide from the beautiful perfection of God’s Grace—not Jonah, not Jennifer, not “THOSE” people, not us.

Maybe this same grace of God can give US the grace to forgive, too. We can be a people of Grace. We can forgive one another; we CAN forgive “Those” people. We never really find out whether Jonah learned this lesson or not. I know for a fact that Jennifer did learn this lesson. After years of prayer, counseling, and inner turmoil, she did truly forgive David and learn to accept that God had forgiven her. She finally began to understand how God works. Yes, we CAN forgive “THOSE” people. In doing so, we begin to practice grace in our own lives. But, as humans we’ve got to realize that we are incapable of God’s perfect Grace. That doesn’t mean that perfect grace shouldn’t be our goal. The long road to grace will be messy and complicated, so maybe we could start small. Try to forgive those in your circle of influence who have wronged you. If you are able to forgive, then take another step. Forgive someone who wronged you long ago; forgive someone who wronged a member of your family. Practice random acts of kindness. Say please and thank you. Start living your life as a child of Grace. If you do, you will find that your heart grows stronger. Mahatma Ghandi once said, “The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.” Be strong.